A Poem by Antonio Machado

June 7, 2009 in poetry | Tags: , , , | Leave a comment

As I read this poem, I am reminded of St. John of the Cross’s poem, “The Dark Night of the Soul.” Lorenna McKennitt does an especially lovely version of it on her album The Mask and the Mirror. Both of these poems read beautifully in the original Spanish. But I think that Robert Bly has transmitted the sense of them.

Last Night, as I Was Sleeping.

Last night, as I was sleeping,
I dreamt — marvelous error!—
that a spring was breaking
out in my heart.
I said: Along which secret aqueduct,
Oh water, are you coming to me,
water of a new life
that I have never drunk?

Last night, as I was sleeping,
I dreamt — marvelous error!—
that I had a beehive
here inside my heart.
And the golden bees
were making white combs
and sweet honey
from my old failures.

Last night, as I was sleeping,
I dreamt — marvelous error!—
that a fiery sun was giving
light inside my heart.
It was fiery because I felt
warmth as from a hearth,
and sun because it gave light
and brought tears to my eyes.

Last night, as I slept,
I dreamt — marvelous error!—
that it was God I had
here inside my heart.

There isn’t much to be said; the poem says it all. The imagery of buzzing bees and a fiery sun inside my heart is stirring. The aliveness, beauty, sweetness, warmth, light,, and water of life, which is God, dwells within us at the very center of our being. Oh “marvelous error” indeed.

honeycomb

It might bother some, the translation of “bendita ilusion” (blessed illusion, dream, or vision) with “marvelous error.” Yet I am reminded of the words from our Easter vigil liturgy: “O happy fault, O necessary sin of Adam, which gained for us so great a Redeemer! Our Redeemer has, indeed, made sweet honey from all of our failures!

Videos on the USCCB Website

April 23, 2009 in Uncategorized | 3 comments

Recently three of us, Sisters Carla Kovack, Patricia Bruno, and myself, had the privelege of preparing a reflection for some of the daily scripture readings during the Easter season – in April, to be videotaped at the chancery office in San Francisco. Our videos would then be available online at the U.S. Bishops’ (USCCB) website.

Besides having the daily readings available online, and by podcast, the USCCB also offers daily video reflections. This is a wonderful service that the Church offers to everyone to assist them in incorporating the scriptures into their daily lives.

All of them are worth watching, but of course I’m putting in my plug for our sisters’ reflections. The link is: http://www.nccbuscc.org/video/reflections.shtml. The dates are: April 18 – Sr. Pat Farrell, OP; April 21 – Sr. Carla Kovack, OP; and April 25 – Sr. Patricia Bruno, OP.

Thank God for the Poets

March 26, 2009 in poetry | Tags: , , , , | 2 comments

Perhaps I am into poetry at the moment. Certainly, I am enjoying Rumi.

God’s presence is there in front of us,
a fire on the left
a lovely stream on the right . . .
Whoever walks into the fire
appears suddenly in the cool stream,
Any head that goes under the water surface,
that head pokes out of the fire.
Most people guard against going into the fire,
and end up in it . . .
If you are a friend of God,
fire is your water.
You shoud wish to have a hundred thousand
sets of moth wings,
so that you could burn them away, one set a night.
(tr. Coleman Barks)

campfire-copy1

I am reminded of two things.

  1. In both the Gospels of Matthew and Luke, John the Baptist says that the one who will come after him (Jesus) will not be baptizing with water, but with fire. When I look at myself, as well as at most of us, I think we would rather settle for a baptism of water. We shy away from the fire, and end up in it when thrust there.
  2. I am reminded of the words of the song, “Live This Mystery,” by Michael Card. It goes:

As the river seeks to be
forgotten in the sea
so my soul is so thirsty
it longs for Thee.
Like a moth around the flame
drawn to the light
and to the pain.
Since my life is hid in Thee
I must live this mystery.

It is, indeed, a mystery, that that which can draw us, can also repel us.  Paradox and mystery. Our lives are filled with them. We long for passion – for fire. And yet we try to stay away from danger; we do not want to be burned.

Thank God for the poets who find ways to express what we do not. And that their words can open us to mystery.

A Poem I Would Like to Make My Own

March 22, 2009 in poetry | Tags: , , , | 2 comments

Rumi. How could you find a poet that could better express the movement of the soul . . . the stirrings of the heart . . . ?

Hospitality is one of those virtues that religious communities hope that they reflect. And sometimes we’re good at it, and sometimes . . . . . . Well, we fall into that place called human.

door_in_siena

I found this poem today. And I would like to make it my own:

The Guest House

This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice,
meet them at the door laughing,
and invite them in.

Be grateful for whoever comes,
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.

From:The Essential Rumi, p. 109, Translations by Comeman Barks, Harper: San Francisco, 1995.

5th Graders Visiting the Convent

March 12, 2009 in vocations | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Teachers always love field trips! Especially field trips when the children and parents (chaperones) enjoy what they learn. Every year the Diocese of Oakland invites schools of the diocese to send their 5th grade students on a special field trip. The boys go to St. Patrick’s Seminary in Menlo Park and the girls go to a sisters’ motherhouse in the diocese.

Today students came from two diocesan schools to the motherhouse of the Dominican Sisters of San Jose. Three of us sisters, Sister Liz Schille, RGS (a Good Shepherd Sister), Sister

Sister Beth talking to the 5th graders

Sister Beth talking to the 5th graders

Beth Quire, OP (a Dominican Sister of Mission San Jose), and I (a Dominican Sister of San Rafael), taught them a little bit about what it’s like to be a sister, and the importance of answering God’s call in their life. It was a fun day, and the girls and their parents really enjoyed themselves.

Truly, all of us are called . . . from the time we are baptized, or even from the time we are born. God calls us to, as the apostle Luke wrote: “. . . to preach good news to the poor. . . to proclaim freedom for the prisoners and recovery of sight for the blind, to release the oppressed, to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor.” (Luke 4:18-19) God calls us to do this whether we marry or not, whether we become a nun or a sister or not.

Today we talked about our way, as sisters, of living out this call. I always like talking about that, because I love being a sister!

Attending Religious Education Congress

March 5, 2009 in church | Tags: , , , , , | Leave a comment

I always enjoy attending the Los Angeles Religious Education Congress! And fortunately the calendar smiled at me again this year and I was able to attend.

To be sure this is the largest annual gathering of Roman Catholics in the U.S. There are workshops for catechists, teachers, musicians, liturgists, lectors, and anyone looking for spiritual growth.  Sessions are available in English, Spanish, and Vietnamese.

This year I didn’t attend any of the workshops; I was busy distributing materials at the Dominican Family Booth. The Dominican Sisters of San Rafael, Mission San Jose, and Adrian, Michigan, have been staffing this booth for many years. And it is a wonderful experience!

lacongress_boothAs I handed luggage tags with our logo and website (www.sanrafaelop.org), I said, “We’re Dominican Sisters.” The responses were great! Were we the sisters that taught them at such and so school, or from Dominican University? Maybe they had a question about religious life. Sometimes they wrote a note to a sister that they remembered from childhood. Even if we weren’t the Dominican Sisters that had educated them in Chicago or New York, the wonderful memories from their school years was attached to us.

I loved the liturgies, and always wish our regular liturgies in our home parishes were more like these. But I remind myself that this is special, and there is a lot of work and preparation put into these liturgical events. I also remind myself that it is our response to the daily, lack-luster parts of our lives that makes us. And that’s what makes the special and celebratory  . . . well, exactly that. Special and celebratory!

This year’s theme was “Love Unfolding…Igniting Our Yes! Our “yes” lived out may feel daily and lack-luster. The sessions and liturgies delivered what we hoped for. They ignited our yes and revitalized us.

Ash Wednesday Thoughts

February 25, 2009 in spirituality | Tags: , , , | 2 comments

I never thought my Ash Wednesday reflection would begin with the Los Angeles Times, but it has. Tim Rutten quotes Cardinal Mahoney this morning:

According to the calendar, Ash Wednesday occurs [today] and we begin another Lent,” he writes. “Except for this year. Lent actually began in 2007 for many thousands of families all across the Archdiocese of Los Angeles, and we have been in a long and protracted season of Lent ever since. . .

In prior years when life and our financial security were far more predictable, Lent meant that we could choose which special sacrifices we wanted to undertake — but just for six weeks, until Easter Sunday. And then back to normal. But now we have a new reality: We aren’t choosing our sacrifices this year, they have chosen us. And they aren’t just for six weeks; they have been our burden for over 75 weeks now with no sign of relief in sight.

I’m sure I could never express Ash Wednesday thoughts any better than this. Certainly, all of our citizens who are unemployed and face layoffs are praying in the words of the prophet Joel, “Spare, O LORD, your people, and make not your heritage a reproach, with the nations ruling over them! Why should they say among the peoples, ‘Where is their God?’” (Joel 2:17-18)

And so, as I refrain from taking a second helping, or piece of cake, or my favorite selection of See’s candy, I would like to keep in mind those people who do not have the luxury of refraining from anything. As I head out this day on the long drive from San Francisco to Southern California ( a trek down Highway 5  that many might consider penitential), may I keep in mind those who are enslaved and imprisoned in sexual trafficking and do not have the luxury of freedom of movement.

May the things that I refrain from serve to make me more mindful of others. And may mindfulness become a practice that stays with me beyond Ash Wednesday, and well beyond Lent.

50 + 70 = Celebration!

February 17, 2009 in sisters and nuns | Leave a comment

In July the Dominican Sisters will be celebrating the anniversaries all of our sisters who professed their vows 25, 40, 50, 60, 70, and 80 years ago. We call these celebrations Jubilees. On Sunday the 15th, Sister Anne Bertain, OP’s family threw a grand celebration for her on the day of her 70th birthday – which happily falls on her 50th Jubilee.

The celebration was held in Napa, where Sister Anne grew up. In spite of the rain, the hall at St. John’s was full. Many of the sisters attended, as did friends, family, students (who are now adults), parishioners that work and pray with Sister at St. Dominic’s in San Francisco, and the Dominican Friars that Sister Anne has know for so many years.dominican_sisters

Indeed it was a tribute to her love of family, her faithfulness to community, her loyaty to friends, her service to the poor, her fidelity to prayer, and her steadfastness to Dominican life. I’ve been in religious life for fifteen years now, and I am still constantly inspired and encouraged by women like Sister Anne who have given their lives with
such generosity and joy. And I still say, “When I grow up,
I want to be like her . . . and her . . . and her . . .”

The Gift of Community Prayer

February 12, 2009 in community prayer | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

The time we have to pray together in the morning as sisters truly is a gift. It’s one of those regular things about religious life that is there for us day in and day out. (Though we do take a break from it on the weekends here at St. Rose Convent.) Its consistency is a gift. Knowing that my sisters are praying for me when I am not there (out of town, at a meeting, etc.) is a gift. And sometimes the sisters’ reflections on the day’s Scripture reading is also a gift.

Take today for example. Today’s reading was from Mark 7:24-30, and it’s about the Greek (Syrophoenician) woman who came to Jesus looking for healing for her daughter. Jesus was rather gruff with her. Since she was not Hebrew, and Jesus saw his mission as being to his people, the Hebrews, he said to her, “Let the children be fed first. For it is not right to take the food of the children and throw it to the dogs.” Sounds a little off-putting, doesn’t it?

Because this Syrophoenician woman persisted and said, “Lord, even the dogs under the table eat the children’s scraps,” Jesus healed her daughter, and told the woman that when she went home she would find that her daughter would be just fine, and that the demon that tormented her would be gone.

Talk about good news for that family!

I wonder if over these 2000 plus years that Christians have been reading this passage, we’ve tried to sanitize it, by saying that Jesus was only trying to test her faith, and prove a point about faith to his disciples. Otherwise, how could Jesus possibly have acted so abruptly? Some might even suggest that he sounded rude. To top it off, the version of the Gospel that was read from the missal this morning said that Jesus dismissed her with the words, “Be off!”

Sister Cathryn’s brief reflection and prayer grasped all of the incongruity of the situation. Noting that Jesus sometimes got frustrated with his disciples and their obtuseness, she wondered whether or not he might be having an off day. Yet, in the midst of his frustration, and in spite of his sharp words to a woman desperate for her daughter’s well-being, Jesus mission of release to the captives and healing to the broken-hearted still was fulfilled. The demons were cast out of the woman’s daughter.

That can give all of us hope, can’t it? Even when we’re not having the best day . . . . even if we don’t choose the best words . . . . even when someone is standing on our last nerve . . . . God’s liberating and healing power can work through us. It never has been and never will be about us. It’s about GOD working through us, just the way we are.

Now that’s Good News!

A Poem – Ephphatha!

February 5, 2009 in spirituality | Tags: , , , | Leave a comment

When I read the Gospel reading for today, Mark 7:31-37, I was reminded of this poem that I wrote on April 30, 1995, when I was in the novitiate.

Who can hear what is not spoken,
the cry that never parts lips,
the secret, un-whispered desires
never uttered, never stammered?

Who, but one who listens deeply?

Listens deeply and hears.

Hears the hunger of the crowds for true bread,
the searching heart of Zaccheus atop a sycamore,
the desperation of a Canaanite mother, willing to be……
….dog.

Yes, one who listens deeply
hears the lonely heart of a woman at a well,
hears the trembling fear of one grown weak from loss of blood.

Yes, one who listens deeply
 hears the cry of the poor,
hears one’s own voice deep within,
hears the very heartbeat of God.

Yes, there is one who…

but for me

It all takes too much time!

this listening business.
(bus-i-ness
a still, quiet kind of busy-ness)

Listen in prayer.
Listen in conversation.
Listen to the footsteps of birds in flight.

Take time. Pay attention.
Allow God’s voice to sift through a screen of distractions.
“I vow obedience means I promise to pray.” (Carrol)

Attend to the multiple faces,

the many voices,

the reaching hands of God.

What might happen?
…if I did.
Listen (on purpose) I mean. Pay attention.

Would hearing improve?
…ears be opened?

Ephphatha!

Have I, too, been deaf since birth?

…had ears to hear?

Could my heart be opened?

Ephphatha!

They want me to do what?
(don’t let them become they)

Ephphatha!

“It’ll take you and a good wrestling team
to get me to be open to that!”

EPHPHATHA!

Yes, be open.
(even if it takes wrestling with a god)

To allow myself to be surprised at
where, when, how
God’s voice is heard.

In the wisdom of creation,
in the inspired words of Scripture,
in the life and teachings of Jesus,
in the accumulated wisdom of the…tradition,
in the word and example of [others],
in the voices that speak to us of the needs of our world,
and in the directives of…legitimate authority.
(Constitutions of the Dominican Sisters of San Rafael)

And then to
respond.

Whole heartedly, unreservedly,
(is that possible?) without measure.

Joyfully! (that too?)
Not looking back after putting hand to plow.
Without complaint (not me!),
Without longing for what could have been,
what once was (yet grieving the loss).

In Ecclesiastes it is said,

Whatever your hand finds to do,do it with all of your might. (Eccl. 9:10)

No cosmic scavenger hunt, this.

And Paul,

Whatever you do, do it heartily as to the Lord alone and not for those you serve,
knowing that of the Lord you shall receive the reward of the inheritance, for you serve the Lord Christ.
(Col. 3:23-24)

Listen (deeply)

Hear (openly)

Respond (generously)